Love story
>> Monday, July 06, 2009
Blogging. I knew I just couldn't quit blogging. As absurd (mou-liu) as blogging can be, only those who've blogged know that it is not true; or perhaps I am the only person that enjoys blogging even though I blog about nonsense all the time. Haha. Anyway, as bold as I can be, I dare to say that blogging has become part of my life. Geez... you've no idea how boring life can be and you have nothing to do. Nevertheless that aside, I've got a love story to tell. My love story.
So this was how it all began...
As far as I could recall, it happened somewhere in the early, mid or probably end of May 2008. Before that, I had a crush on this girl (whom I think is still amazing). But soon I realized that I was thinking too much, and that she already set her mind towards another guy. Quietly, this love not professed, I leave. Being sad and sorrow, listening to Rihanna's Cry, bearing the nickname [CK - I cry tears, I bleed blood... I am human too afterall] or something like that in MSN, came along this girl whom I recently added. She was aware of the whole thing; text me through MSN, asking me if I was okay... assuring me that everything was going to be alright soon... that in future, there will be other girls for me. As dumb as I can be, not really knowing this girl, it doesn't really matter as the words she said, it did comfort me a little if not too much, I felt better.
Since then, we begin to talk to one another. I could still recall how she wanted to send an sms to her friend but ended up she text me, the wrong recipient, LOL. We form and joined the same group for group assignments. We became friends. So one fine day, I decided to ask her out for a movie but I know that it wouldn't be successful. Thus, I need all the help that I can get..., I used her friends as chaperons not knowing that they (the friends) do have a small tiny plan of their own. The friends bought the tickets, but cunningly they left us both a few rows lower while they the culprits sit a few rows up "chaperoning" us. I've to admit I am a shy guy. I talk a lot during presentations, I have lots of ideas when it comes to projects, but when it comes to girls, I will either froze or I have nothing to say. So, I had nothing to say... keeping quiet throughout the entire movie, while the culprits behind was giggling and laughing all the way.
That continued throughout the entire outing. After movie, we went for lunch at Winter Warmers. Things didn't get any better for me. They met more friends and ex-classmates while being the only guy there, I had nothing much or nothing at all to say, I peeked into the small TV inside Segafredo watching rally racing. LOL. After that outing, came more outing and slowly feelings for her began to develop. I have to say no other female characters minus my mum had that much influence on me. She was the one who changed my perception on Mandarin and Cantonese songs which I used to hate a lot previously.
Then came my birthday, October 30 2008. I have to say its the best birthday I've ever had. Whether she was the mastermind behind all of it, it doesn't matter for she was part of it. A whole group of girls, seven of them, threw a surprise party for me at my house. Damn I have to say I was really happy that night. As days passed, I brought not all but a few, she included for dinner at Bukit Genting. We had lots of fun there, but there was lots of nyamuk too. LOL. And its the first time I drove so far, hahaha... Then came her birthday. No surprise party this time. I knew she was going to be tired. The whole morning out with her friends and fans... (yes, she has lots of fans), she went back home just to bath and change and then came out with me for dinner. What happen after dinner was between me and her, eh eh eh... by all means whatever happened, no body contact was involved. (laughin... know you guys will think nonsense).
Whatever happened that night, things began to change. I accepted her explanation. I've to admit here that I was shy and being a coward. There is nothing I could do now, its the past. Things moved on from there, the first few day we weren't really talking or chatting with one another but soon, things began to turn normal again. But, the semester ended and that means I wouldn't be able to see her as often. Counting the days foolishly, days that I've not met her face to face, we soon meet up again on December 30, 2008. But things were different again. She was kinda cool. I felt a bit depressed la. At the same time, I was having mixed feeling. The girl that I had a crush on previously was facing a few issues and that really made me feel disorientated for quite sometime. I had thoughts of having another go for the crush, but again that never really happened and I backed off as usual.
A new year, new semester, her last semester. Everyone was so eager to complete their diplomas while me, the very least I wanted to do was to freeze time knowing that I wouldn't be able to turn back time. Sadly, reality hit me... I am not Hiro from Heroes. LOL. Time flies and that's it, the semester ends and I seldom see her then though we still chat and all, I began to back off, didn't wanted to feel what I am feeling now. She went to work, she got really busy and we chat lesser and lesser. There was a point where we didn't chat at all for weeks. As ugly as all this could end, I went into an argument with her friend. I wasn't sure if she believed me, but at least I did explain myself. There rest was up to her.
Surprisingly, she dropped by my house to give me some cookies. I was very surprised I became disorientated. I had a gift for her, which I bought a couple days ago that I forgot to pass to her, LOL. This gift may be the final gift that she'll ever receive from me here in Malaysia, but I guess it wouldn't be the last present from me. She is leaving today. I couldn't really sleep last night. For the first time, I was not eager to see sunrise today. I am not going to airport to send her off, I didn't want to create a scene there. And that is how my story ends here...
Like blogging, (not that I am comparing her to blogging, how can you compare someone so special to blogging) she too became part of my life or perhaps there wasn't really anything there but me being vain. I wished I had knew her earlier. I wished I had said the words when the time matters most. But it all didn't happen. If I were to say that three words, I would really want to mean it. I hesitated, perhaps the timing wasn't right or maybe I didn't have that confidence to say it. She has become part of my not so extraordinary life and she turned it into a wonderful life, she is a past that is never my history, not now and not in the near future. Feelings for her up until today though at times were shaken, they had never change. I wrote a lot about how much I love her but I have never said it, I can only write it down. That would be my biggest regret.
That my friend is my story. Forgive me if I had wasted 10 minutes of your life reading this absurd (mou liu) post of mine. Hahaha... This is my comeback into blogging. So shower me will all your comments and flood my chatbox. Hahahaa...
P/S: I love you, always and forever. I wish you all the best in your studies over at Australia.
So this was how it all began...
As far as I could recall, it happened somewhere in the early, mid or probably end of May 2008. Before that, I had a crush on this girl (whom I think is still amazing). But soon I realized that I was thinking too much, and that she already set her mind towards another guy. Quietly, this love not professed, I leave. Being sad and sorrow, listening to Rihanna's Cry, bearing the nickname [CK - I cry tears, I bleed blood... I am human too afterall] or something like that in MSN, came along this girl whom I recently added. She was aware of the whole thing; text me through MSN, asking me if I was okay... assuring me that everything was going to be alright soon... that in future, there will be other girls for me. As dumb as I can be, not really knowing this girl, it doesn't really matter as the words she said, it did comfort me a little if not too much, I felt better.
Since then, we begin to talk to one another. I could still recall how she wanted to send an sms to her friend but ended up she text me, the wrong recipient, LOL. We form and joined the same group for group assignments. We became friends. So one fine day, I decided to ask her out for a movie but I know that it wouldn't be successful. Thus, I need all the help that I can get..., I used her friends as chaperons not knowing that they (the friends) do have a small tiny plan of their own. The friends bought the tickets, but cunningly they left us both a few rows lower while they the culprits sit a few rows up "chaperoning" us. I've to admit I am a shy guy. I talk a lot during presentations, I have lots of ideas when it comes to projects, but when it comes to girls, I will either froze or I have nothing to say. So, I had nothing to say... keeping quiet throughout the entire movie, while the culprits behind was giggling and laughing all the way.
That continued throughout the entire outing. After movie, we went for lunch at Winter Warmers. Things didn't get any better for me. They met more friends and ex-classmates while being the only guy there, I had nothing much or nothing at all to say, I peeked into the small TV inside Segafredo watching rally racing. LOL. After that outing, came more outing and slowly feelings for her began to develop. I have to say no other female characters minus my mum had that much influence on me. She was the one who changed my perception on Mandarin and Cantonese songs which I used to hate a lot previously.
Then came my birthday, October 30 2008. I have to say its the best birthday I've ever had. Whether she was the mastermind behind all of it, it doesn't matter for she was part of it. A whole group of girls, seven of them, threw a surprise party for me at my house. Damn I have to say I was really happy that night. As days passed, I brought not all but a few, she included for dinner at Bukit Genting. We had lots of fun there, but there was lots of nyamuk too. LOL. And its the first time I drove so far, hahaha... Then came her birthday. No surprise party this time. I knew she was going to be tired. The whole morning out with her friends and fans... (yes, she has lots of fans), she went back home just to bath and change and then came out with me for dinner. What happen after dinner was between me and her, eh eh eh... by all means whatever happened, no body contact was involved. (laughin... know you guys will think nonsense).
Whatever happened that night, things began to change. I accepted her explanation. I've to admit here that I was shy and being a coward. There is nothing I could do now, its the past. Things moved on from there, the first few day we weren't really talking or chatting with one another but soon, things began to turn normal again. But, the semester ended and that means I wouldn't be able to see her as often. Counting the days foolishly, days that I've not met her face to face, we soon meet up again on December 30, 2008. But things were different again. She was kinda cool. I felt a bit depressed la. At the same time, I was having mixed feeling. The girl that I had a crush on previously was facing a few issues and that really made me feel disorientated for quite sometime. I had thoughts of having another go for the crush, but again that never really happened and I backed off as usual.
A new year, new semester, her last semester. Everyone was so eager to complete their diplomas while me, the very least I wanted to do was to freeze time knowing that I wouldn't be able to turn back time. Sadly, reality hit me... I am not Hiro from Heroes. LOL. Time flies and that's it, the semester ends and I seldom see her then though we still chat and all, I began to back off, didn't wanted to feel what I am feeling now. She went to work, she got really busy and we chat lesser and lesser. There was a point where we didn't chat at all for weeks. As ugly as all this could end, I went into an argument with her friend. I wasn't sure if she believed me, but at least I did explain myself. There rest was up to her.
Surprisingly, she dropped by my house to give me some cookies. I was very surprised I became disorientated. I had a gift for her, which I bought a couple days ago that I forgot to pass to her, LOL. This gift may be the final gift that she'll ever receive from me here in Malaysia, but I guess it wouldn't be the last present from me. She is leaving today. I couldn't really sleep last night. For the first time, I was not eager to see sunrise today. I am not going to airport to send her off, I didn't want to create a scene there. And that is how my story ends here...
Like blogging, (not that I am comparing her to blogging, how can you compare someone so special to blogging) she too became part of my life or perhaps there wasn't really anything there but me being vain. I wished I had knew her earlier. I wished I had said the words when the time matters most. But it all didn't happen. If I were to say that three words, I would really want to mean it. I hesitated, perhaps the timing wasn't right or maybe I didn't have that confidence to say it. She has become part of my not so extraordinary life and she turned it into a wonderful life, she is a past that is never my history, not now and not in the near future. Feelings for her up until today though at times were shaken, they had never change. I wrote a lot about how much I love her but I have never said it, I can only write it down. That would be my biggest regret.
That my friend is my story. Forgive me if I had wasted 10 minutes of your life reading this absurd (mou liu) post of mine. Hahaha... This is my comeback into blogging. So shower me will all your comments and flood my chatbox. Hahahaa...
P/S: I love you, always and forever. I wish you all the best in your studies over at Australia.
1 comments:
oh....
elmo
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